I’m a Drunk Toddler

I was working on a vidcast for a class yesterday (which was horrific by the way. For those of you brave enough to make it a hobby, I salute you.), and I did some of my recording when I had just woken up. I thought that I was awake enough that you couldn’t tell that I had just awaken from a nap, but I was wrong. So very wrong. I listened to the recordings and I had an epiphany….

I sound like a drunk 4 year old when I’m tired.

I was astonished and disturbed. I’m a 22 year old woman. I should not sound like that. . . Further more why hasn’t anyone told me? I’ve been married for a year now and was with my hubby 3 1/2 years before that, surely he must have known. Or my best friend since 3rd grade, she must have heard it. WHY HASN’T ANYONE TOLD ME??!!

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Maoam?

537295_551257641581729_1209481373_nWhilst procrastinating my homework, I was on Facebook and came across this lovely little tid bit. At first I was like, “Dafuq did I just see?” This had to be a joke, or at least a novelty candy for those naughty at heart. So I looked into it.

Surprisingly enough, it’s not a novelty thing. This is a legitimate candy from Germany, and webpage for the company says that this is a new package design to “appeal to its target group [with] a unique comic-strip figure … who symbolises the fun and crazy aspect of the brand.” The MAOAM man is a jovial figure who appears in many forms, but the company’s site doesn’t seem to say anything or doesn’t think that there’s anything wrong with their packaging design.

maoam3

The MAOAM package design during the 1990’s

This figure is new, and it wasn’t until recently that he was introduced. Before 2002 it was only fruit featured on any of the sweets.

 

Apparently I’m not the only one with a dirty mind, either. The photo above was featured on Damn! LOL, and some of the comments for the picture are:

He’s gunna pop those Cherry’s if you know what I mean 😉

Insert Brazzers logo here.

Even parents in Europe are in outrage about it, and one such man, Simon Simpkins from Pontefract, West Yorkshire, went to Dailymail to voice his opinion. The father said that ‘The lime, whom I assume to be the gentlemen in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face.” The encounter was so distressing for the man and his family that his ‘wife became quite distressed and had to sit down in the car park.’

I’m not going to lie, this seems like a good idea gone terribly wrong. It looks bad on both the designer and the company that allowed it to be mass produced. This may be bad promotion of the company’s part, but it could be great as far as selling the product. What better advertising and promotion than people clamoring and talking about your controversial product?

Sources:

MAOAM Webpage

“Father’s fury over children’s ‘pornographic’ sweet wrappers”

Ways to Get Rid of Unwanted Attention

I was faced with this situation a while ago, and then again last night while talking to a co-worker. She said that she was having problems with these guys while at a local club. Her and her friends were dancing, minding their own business when these guys started to dance upon them. She tried to be nonchalant, as she typically doesn’t like to be confrontational, and started dancing away; but the guys continued to bother her and her friends.  It had gotten so bad, that they ended up just having to leave the club and end their fantastical night out on a bad note.

This instantly made me think of ‘The Face” that Jenna Marbles, a blogger/entertainer who is hilariously awesome, had ‘invented’ to get these guys to stop ‘dance raping’ you. The video is below for those of you who haven’t seen it and need some wisdom.

Now, I haven’t used the techniques in her other video, but I can say from experience that “The Face” works. I’ve used it  once to make these creepy Mo-Fo’s to leave me alone. It works. But I have also found something else that works, and it’s a variation of what Jenna had said. Acting in extreme emotion. But I took it a step further, and just went bat shit crazy. No man wants to deal with a loose cannon, like Jenna explained, and no man wants to deal with someone who might potentially stab them. Anyway, my technique is just get angry. Really angry, and revert to your inner ghetto child. Be loud. Be obnoxious. Flail your arms, and make them feel really uncomfortable. Uses of the phrases like “Oh Heeeeellll no” and such are encouraged. Because when you make a scene, you draw attention to the fact they’re being a douche canoe and won’t leave you the alone. They realize this, and will never talk to you again.

Now I’ve only used this once, but it seems to work. I don’t recommend that you use it often, because then you’ll really just seem like a crazy bitch. Well, unless you are a crazy bitch, and if that’s the case carry on. But I mean, these are meant to be used in emergencies. They’re effective and useful, but over use might make people think that you are in fact a psycho.  So be thoughtful if you really never want to never talk to this person again in your life, and then act accordingly.

So, have you ever heard of “The Face”? Have you ever been in this kind of situation, and, if so, do you have any helpful hints that you’d like to share? Because sharing, my friends, is caring.